Creating Positive Affirmations That Really Work

Figure out what it is you want

Creating positive affirmations can be easier than you might think. This starts with tracing the emotion that is really behind the goal. If the idea is to connect with friends more often, what is the emotion behind why? After some inner digging, adjustments to this goal may need to be made.

Acknowledge what you don’t want

When thinking of what it is that annoys, upsets, or otherwise causes any negative feelings, it helps not to dwell. Acknowledge the situation present and like Eckhart Tolle says:

Eckhart tolle

“Accept – then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it.”

Eckhart Tolle

Practicing this will force a more positive (or less negative in the beginning) perception of the world and ultimately, leak into the personal situation present.

Be specific when creating positive affirmations

Think about it: future plans, intention statements, mantras, prayers, visualizations, or affirmations are essentially all the same thing–“putting it out there.”

Making intentions–big or small– specific and deliberate help to establish a direction for thoughts to head. It gives our anxious brains a focus so we can start organizing the world around us to fit into the direction we’re headed.

Writing something down or thinking about it in terms of sensory specifics forces our brains to think of how we are going to express this to make it true. This is one of the hacks of creating positive affirmations.

Look for evidence of the now

The trick here is to think about the affirmation or intention statement and find evidence to prove that it’s true.

Often times, those of us who deal with anxiety issues hyper-focus on the evidence to prove otherwise.

The solution is to put that thinker to good use and look for evidence proving the positive self-talk.

Example affirmation: I am a fun person and people like to be around me.

Evidence for this: Two people messaged to say they miss me this week and appreciated my humor.

Appreciate and reframe

Feeling gratitude for everything that brings joy, relief, lightness, confidence, or any other form of happiness into our lives is so incredibly important for mental well-being. Research shows that just focusing on gratitude makes for higher levels of happiness and fulfillment.

Once getting into the habit of looking for the evidence for any and all positive self-talk, it’s crucial to take time to appreciate every time piece that pops up without judgment.

Personal Example: Woken up by a needy Great Dane, I wasn’t happy when I couldn’t fall back asleep an hour before my alarm was supposed to sound.

Reframed: Appreciate whatever was in this situation: my adorable cuddly Ezra (that I’m happy to have in my life) and the unbelievable display of oranges and pinks in the sky as the sun was getting ready to rise.

It may be strange, but the peaceful and calm feeling from a quiet morning put me in a great frame of mind for the rest of the day.

For you, it may be something completely different. It’s important to be aware that these are thoughts that may unintentionally frame our outlook on the rest of the day, and that is so powerful.